Jon had wondered, once she'd gotten the full story from Lucas (or rather, once she'd been around Lucas long enough for Lucas to gleefully lay out the whole tale without any more provocation than simply being asked what had happened,) whether that was it. With this "Enemy" defeated once and for all, the entity at its core destroyed and what remained of them left to return to what they were meant to be from time immemorial...were there other dangers out there in this strange new world she'd made?
Well, there probably would be, eventually. People would learn how to use magic, but they'd still be people, for better and for worse. But for the moment, it seemed that things were over. A whole week went by without any major incidents. Then two, then three...and life kept rolling along. After everything that had happened in such a short space, it was somehow even more surreal to merely be going through the rhythm of ordinary, daily life in the world of the changed Sun, without any invasions or inexplicable blackouts or eclipses or anything. Jon got up, ate breakfast, went to school, met with her circle, worked at practicing magic, came home, ate dinner, went to bed, and did it all again the next day.
That wasn't to say that nothing was happening. There was her circle, for one. They were all practicing to some extent, and all making some degree of progress. Haru and Ken were more casual dabblers, but then they hadn't really joined the group out of a desire to become involved in magic, they'd just wanted to figure out how Jon fit into Haru's dreams; nevertheless, they were still sticking around, and she couldn't complain about that. Karyn was much the same way, though she made more progress simply on account of hanging around with Jon more, which often led to them discussing it. Jon herself was gradually getting the hang of things, becoming more comfortable with the idea of magic as simply a natural force in life than she ever thought she could've, and finding a surprising number of practical applications for it.
Tim was more of a slow goer, but showed a keen interest in an analytical approach to the subject, trying to figure out if there were underlying rules and systems that could be worked with. He'd also expressed some interest in whether technological approaches to magic were possible; it'd started with him acquiring some behemoth old computer from the old city library for his electronics collection, which he'd claimed he just "got a weird feeling" from. Finally, there was Lilly. The little squirrel-girl was a bit of a slow learner with magic, which she found frustrating, but out of the entire group she showed the most raw passion for the subject, and once she did get something, she really got it, and would often make intuitive leaps based on what she'd learned that surprised even Brittany. Jon had no doubt that eventually she was going to be very skilled with magic indeed, even if it took her longer than she wanted.
Other things had been happening as well, of course. One of the newly-changed students at her school, a doe-girl, turned out to be pregnant, which had caused some commotion among the student body, and after word had gotten around, she had started wearing a headband with a pair of antlers glued to it. Jon wasn't sure whether that was supposed to be a standoffish warning display, as a reaction to the attention she was receiving, or some kind of defiant statement of retained male identity, but she didn't have any desire to approach the girl and ask. Tiffany had gotten involved in the student government again, and showed a drive she'd never matched beforehand. Sarah had started taking voice lessons, and to Jon's surprise she and Karyn had actually started to get along better, though they didn't really cross paths much outside of school. And the band Haru and Ken were in was doing pretty well for themselves, and actually got to play a couple of local venues once or twice.
It wasn't just at school that things were happening, either. Johanna had returned to Europe, where Jon understood she was trying to work for the creation of a "reservation" sort of affair for her people in parts of Siberia - well, for the ones who were interested in reclaiming this lost identity. Jon found it interesting to consider - was the government there going to be amenable to that? She supposed Johanna had the Fire, not to mention the interest of a large swath of the paleoanthropology community (those that weren't sticking to their guns on the position that Neanderthals couldn't possibly have been behaviorally modern and refusing to accept the changed ones as authentic, anyway,) to back her; she could probably manage all right.
Lucas was still in Lakeside more often than not; after all, Ms. Wilkins lived there, and Jon got the impression that the angel-woman was trying to focus on where things were going to go for them now that life had settled down a bit. Frankly, it was bizarre seeing Lucas of all people trying to be more mature and applying herself...so Jon tended not to think about it. She spoke to Alan on a semi-regular basis, as well; the harpy-woman was mostly just adjusting and trying to get through life. She hadn't seemed to give much consideration to what, if anything, she was going to do with the Air-bubble.
At home, things were quieter. Her parents had managed to avoid being changed this entire time (as had Karyn's.) Zoe was still a bit embarassed to show some of the more macabre aspects of her slime-girl existence around other people, but she was gradually becoming more comfortable being what she was in front of her family, and didn't have to be pressed into eating with them anymore. Mikey, on the other hand, had remained not really perturbed at all by her change, aside from the surprise she'd shown at that sudden growth spurt. But she hadn't had another one of those since, and it sounded like she might undergo such a change only once or twice a year. In the meantime, she retained the calm, pleasant demeanor she'd shown ever since becoming a gynoid.
Becca was still living with the Madisons; she seemed to be doing alright, though she seemed a little surprised at the prospect of actually having fulfilled her duty as one of the Numbers. Trident (whom Jon still had difficulty thinking of as not being Becca's doll) had said that her nature as Three was a permanent fixture of her new life, but didn't know whether she would be called on to protect the world again in her lifetime. As for Jon herself...
...well, she was okay, for the moment. Life as a slug-girl had its own particular irritations, from the monthly pains to the way trying to sleep on her belly squashed her breasts underneath her to the way her lower body kept up its moist coat of mucus even as the year drew on into full-fledged winter. But...well, she was coping. There were annoyances, but she could live with them, for now. And besides those...well, she guessed she didn't mind things too much. But it made her nervous to think that way about it; she didn't want to get complacent. Even as it was she vacillated between anxiously counting down the days one week and not really thinking about it at all the next. She had to stay focused on the goal; she had to be thinking about how she was going to fix this, when the time came.
As for life overall...she and Karyn had been hanging out more often, which she liked; she was glad they'd stayed good friends despite the social barriers that came with puberty and the awkward aspects of adolescence, but she was happier to be getting past all that now. She'd started hanging out with Tim more often, too. He was good company and seemed to find her good company. They didn't share each other's every interest, but there was enough common ground that they always had something to talk about, and she supposed it was probably more interesting this way, anyway; it was interesting for her to listen to him explain what he found interesting about electronics to her, and he seemed to take a similar interest in her views on things like fantasy literature. He did have some strange habits that she'd started to notice, though. When he was around her for any significant length of time, he'd start to exude chemicals that her antennae could pick up on, for one. Not that they were unpleasant; quite the opposite, in fact. It was just weird that it only seemed to happen around her. And sometimes he seemed to get oddly distracted...but it was okay, she supposed. Everybody has their own quirks, after all.
And so the weeks rolled by. It was the beginning of March when the day finally arrived. Six whole months the world had been like this...but today, she would do it. She would finally put things right.
Jon woke up quite early that morning; in fact, she'd hardly even gotten to sleep the night before. She didn't have much stomach for breakfast; she was too tense. She had a cup of coffee, anyway; as a morning ritual, it was soothing. She went up to her room, took out the stone, and looked it over. There had never been any visible indication of its condition, but she knew it was ready, and she swore she could almost smell the magic on it, with her antennae. Part of her wanted to make the wish right then and there...but she'd promised her circle they could be there for it, and she had a feeling that Lucas would turn up, as Lucas was wont to do. Instead, she went out to get the mail.
The weather was slowly starting to turn warmer, which was nice, considering that her foot was still coated in watery mucus. But that hadn't been as much of a problem as she was expecting it would, even in the depth of winter. For one, her slime wasn't exactly prone to evaporation in winter weather, and while it was weird and unsettling to have a coat of tiny ice crystals form instead, it meant that they were more likely to act as an insulator to help retain body heat rather than carry it away into the air. It helped that her foot had a lower surface-area-to-mass ratio than human legs and more evenly-distributed circulation, too. And of course she really wasn't out in the snow that much to begin with, not when she could just drive the van places.
Jon made it out to the mailbox without any trouble. She stared up at the Sun, still shimmering with its pale rainbow pastels, bright and sharply outlined in the crisp winter air. Soon...but not just yet. For now, she'd just focus on the morning routine, get the mail, bring it in, and-
She stopped and stared, wide-eyed, at an envelope addressed in a familiar hand. It couldn't be... Heart racing, she grabbed the rest of the mail, rushed inside as fast as she could manage, dumped the other letters on the table, and hurried up to her room, shutting the door behind her, still in her winter jacket. Hands trembling, she fumblingly worked the envelope open. There was no return address but she knew this writing, the same handwriting the letter was written in:
*Dear Jon,
Quite a feat you managed this fall! You're going to have to tell me all about the how and why of it when we see each other next. I can only presume that your circumventing of the range limit had something to do with the celestial alignment at the time - and if you found out about that, I'm sure you must know it's due to recur soon, maybe by the time this letter reaches you; I'll be watching for your next trick!
I can't tell you how sorry I am for the deception re: my death, but I'm afraid it was necessary. Forces from Outside were getting ready to break through into our world; I've discovered evidence to suggest that they have in the past, and I think I may have drawn their attention with some of my experiments with the artifact. Naturally, I wanted it as far away from myself as possible, in case they came for me. To my surprise, only a few of them did, and they seemed to simply vanish altogether a few months ago - around the time I received word of some strange goings-on up your way.
I hope this letter finds you safe, and that I didn't bring any trouble upon you by sending you the artifact. Please don't share the news with your mother or family just yet; I'll see you as soon as I possibly can, but first I want to be sure that it's safe and They really are gone. I look a little different, now; do you, I wonder?
Love as always,
G.F.*
"G.F." was Grandpa Frank, of course. Jon stared at the letter, tears welling up in her eyes. She could hardly believe it; she'd suspected it, she'd wanted to believe it, wanted it to be true, but to actually see this, to see it with her own eyes and know that he really was still alive...it was almost more than she could bear. She hugged the letter to her breast, dropped back onto the bed, and found herself crying out of happiness.
It was nearly noon when Jon left her room, after carefully tucking the letter away in a desk drawer. To be honest she wanted to shout the news to the entire household right now, but her grandfather was probably right in asking her to keep quiet; her mom had put on a brave face when her grandpa had been declared dead, but to break that news to her and then tell her she had to wait before she could see him again...no, it would be better to wait. Nevertheless, she was happier than she would've thought possible. Her grandpa was alive, the stone was finally ready, the alignment was right, and she was going to fix what she'd messed up. There was not a damn thing that could get her down right now.
She grabbed the stone and tucked it safely into her coat pocket, then left the house and headed out to the driveway. She stopped short of the van, however, when she saw Tim standing there. His parents' car was parked a little ways down the block, and she thought she could make out the outline of the water-nymph that was his father in the window.
"Uh, hey," she said, a little surprised. "What're you doing here? I was just heading off to the woods..." She'd told him when and where, along with the rest of the circle; she wasn't sure why he was here and not there...
The drow-boy nodded. "Y-yeah," he said, nervously. "I...Jon, I...came to talk with you about...something."
Jon felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. This was not how good conversations typically started... "What are you talking about?" she said, a little more accusatorily than she'd intended.
Tim bit his lip. She'd never seen him this nervous before; usually he was so easy-going... "I...I wanted to talk to you about...about you...st-staying this w-way," he stammered.
What? Staying like this? That was nonsense! He knew perfectly well she was on her way to...to...oh no. No, she had to be reading him wrong. He couldn't possibly... "I...I, uh...what?" she said, fumbling for words. "Tim, I'm...I'm going to change the Sun back. What are you talking about? Why would I stay like...like this!?" She gestured down at her body, her ridiculous, bizarre, wrong-gendered body. Was he insane?
He looked more crestfallen than she'd ever seen a boy; in the back of her mind, she thought it had something to do with the ears, and the slight downward tilt they took. "But...but then...we couldn't be..." He stared at her. "I...I thought you felt the same way..."
A horrible, piercing burst of clarity washed over her. The sinking feeling in her stomach became the bottom dropping out altogether. She felt her pulse racing. "I...what? No! Tim, what the...no! The hell did you get that...?...just...no!" He really meant it. He wanted...he wanted her. As a girl, to a boy...to him...he wanted her to be his...his...he wanted to... Images raced through her mind, no matter how she tried to shut them out. What was worse, she could feel part of herself responding to them, to the idea, a part of herself she hadn't wanted to believe existed, a part of herself she'd been trying to ignore, trying to repress, trying to deny, for six months, six whole months, and now he was dragging it out into the light, forcing her to acknowledge it, trying to get her to submit to it, to...to...
He reached out a hand towards her. She shrank back from it. "Don't touch me," Jon snapped. Startled, he drew it back. "I'm going to the clearing," she said, icily. "I'm going to change the Sun back. I...I won't even be this anymore." And...and now she felt like...like she was announcing her intent to murder her self. Damn him for putting her through this!
Tim started to tremble. She found herself, against all odds, feeling sorry for him. She remembered how hard it was, to be a teenage boy, to be caught between the carefree dependence of boyhood and the self-reliant independence of manhood and not really sure where you fell, to be trying to establish yourself as an Ego at the point in your life where your ego was the most vulnerable it would probably ever be, to be deathly afraid of baring your soul to anybody exactly when you needed support the most...to be so defined by what you could do when you still hadn't learned how to do it, and most of all by your success or failure to establish relationships with a group of people who probably didn't even know you existed...God damn him for making her feel this way!
"It...but it...it doesn't have to be that way!" he protested. "Y-you...you could make a wish...we could be...I don't want to lose you, Jon!" he yelped.
"SHUT UP!" she shrieked, and stalked toward the van. He continued as if he hadn't heard her, probably because he didn't want to have heard her. "We could...we could be..."
Slam.
"...together..."
The van roared to life and peeled out of the driveway a good deal faster than it was actually supposed to be going.
How dare he...how DARE he! Jon wasn't sure how she managed to drive with hot, blinding tears in her eyes, but she was too caught up in herself to even care. As if she existed to make him happy! To be what he wanted her to be! "I don't want to lose you!" As if he had her! Owned her! Who did he think he was!? He didn't give a damn what she wanted!
What she wanted...God damn it, why did he have to dredge this up!? This thing inside her that she'd kept out of her way for six whole goddamn months, and all it took was one stupid conversation...she thought of his gentle face, his midnight skin, his lean frame...GOD! Damn it damn it damn it damn it DAMN it! This wasn't her! She wasn't a her! She was a guy, she was male, she was just stuck in this stupid body, this stupid freakish half-slug female body, and she'd almost made it through without having to deal with anything more than the monthly indignities, without ever feeling...
...oh God no. No, that...that wasn't true. The horrible, horrible clarity that had come over her now extended back to the last six months, to the time she'd met him, to all the time she'd spent with him since then, to the stray thoughts about him, to...to...augh! As if putting her through that conversation wasn't enough, as if forcing this side of her into the light wasn't enough, now he was invading her past...
She was at the clearing. She was out of the van. Karyn was saying something. It had the word "Tim" in it. She ignored it. Lucas was there. She remembered all the winking remarks with her perfect, horrible clarity now. She stared daggers. Don't you say a single word, angel. She was in the center of the clearing. People were there; people she trusted, people she'd invited. Someone else was there, too, some Woman. She didn't care anymore. She took out the stone. She stared at it. She shut out everything else.
This was it. This was her power. She could do anything she wanted. Yes, she could make a wish. She could reinvent herself, make herself into some darling little acquiescent dingbat, be some bubbly little housewife, be with Tim, forget all about ever being Jon. She could. It was within her power. Part of her liked the idea - or liked certain aspects of it, anyway, which was just as bad. She could make that wish, she could forget this ever happened, she could be someone else and then maybe it would stop hurting to be her.
No. No. This was it. This was the moment. She had to do this. Even if she did want to be someone else, which she didn't, it didn't matter. She owed it to the world to fix what she'd screwed up - and she owed it to everybody who had been coincidentally bettered by her mistake to preserve that for them. She steeled herself, and she said the words, the words that she'd prepared so carefully...
"I wish that the Sun would change back, and that its light would change back only the people who are better off being in their original forms."
And the world changed again...
