(author's note: okay, this is a bit silly and probably won't go anywhere. I'm sorry, but it was tearing at my mind so I had to let it out)
"While I was not looking, someone planted this thing on my desk. And they even labeled it." She showed the gun to the class, including Jon and Karyn. It was a Coconut Gun.
Experimentally, Mrs. Billie D. Williams aimed it towards an open window and pulled the trigger. Several coconuts launched out of the gun, and then after a short pause, several more followed.
"This coconut gun," Mrs. Williams said, "fires in spurts. It it shoots you, it's gonna hurt."
Karyn and Jon just looked at each other. Was this the interesting thing?
Mrs. Williams put the gun back down on her desk, but a final round went off as she did so, hitting Karyn square in the shoulder. Jon balked. Where once fair lady stood, now stood two coconuts.
"No!" he cried. "What's going on here?" Jon reached for the stone in his backpack, screaming in his head "I wish Karyn wasn't a coconut," but what came out instead was "I wish I was my English teacher's son."
Jon turned to Mrs. Williams in horror, who just looked back at him confused. "What's going on, young-" the teacher's face went pale a moment, but the color returned to her face very quickly. "What's going on, honey?"
"What the hell did I wish that for?"
Jon Williams looked back and forth between the coconuts, one of which was formerly his best friend, and his teacher, who was now apparently his mom, right on the verge of tears, when the classroom door opened and an old man in a bathrobe poked his head in and said "I did it!"
The Wizard closed the door and strolled back out into the school's main hallway. He hummed smugly to himself, because he knew something that nobody else in the school knew. During the scuffle between Steve Farber and the cheerleaders, somehow the Geek Gun had gone off and shot... the plot. Now nothing happened because of some rational flow of events, but merely in order to create as many culture references as possible, and the more obscure the better.
He sincerely wished he could stay at the school to observe the changes that were occurring, but he had to get to the mall. He had a shop to run.
