"Oh, no. No, no, no." Jon's upper body tried to put on the air brakes even as his feet marched inexorably forward,
"Oh, yes. Yes, yes, yes!" The voice from the shoes seemed to urge Jon's feet even faster still. It was not the speed that Jon objected to, but rather the destination: a crowd of popular girls, mostly cheerleaders, who Jon knew would never give him the time of day.
"The feet in Sarah's shoes would never think to start the day without exchanging pleasantries with her friends. And you will exchange pleasantries, or so help me."
Jon got the message. "Uh," he stuttered as he approached the assemblage, "how are you girls doing today?"
"Well we were doing better before you showed up," Nicole Forsyth spat.
"Don't let her get away with that," the shoes commanded.
"What?" Jon wasn't sure whether he was addressing Nicole or the shoes, but both responded.
"I said we don't want you here!"
"I said insult her back!"
"I don't know what to say!"
"Just say buh-bye," Nicole turned, flipping her hair and urging the rest of the cheerleaders to walk away.
"Nope. This interaction does not end this way," the shoes said. "Not while you're in Sarah's shoes."
Jon felt an energy building in his feet, like a foot massage gone wrong, and then in an instant it released, shooting throughout his whole body, and he felt his mouth start moving of its own accord.
"Don't you dare walk away from me, Nicole."
"Excuse me?" the cheerleader turned around.
"You can't talk to me like that. Not when I know that you stuffed your bra until 10th grade." Jon, until that moment, had no idea that Nicole had ever stuffed her bra.
"How dare you--"
"Not when I know that you wear hand-me-downs from your cousin in Savannah." Jon, until that moment, had no idea that Nicole had a cousin in Savannah.
"Hey, those clothes are cu--"
"Not when I know that you wear hand-me-downs from your mom." Jon, until that moment, hadn't seen anything wrong with a teenager wearing hand-me-downs from her mom.
"How do you--"
"Do you really want me to go on, Nicole?" Now that Jon thought about it, Nicole had looked pretty tacky until she began hanging out with Sarah more. Nicole wasn't a threat. She was a paper lion, all growl and no grit. Jon could handle her any day of the week.
"Ugh. Just. Mmmpf!" Nicole stamped her foot and walked away again, but this time she was clearly off-balance.
"There," Sarah's voice re-entered Jon's head, "that's how you deal with someone who's rude to you when you're in Sarah's shoes."
