It was around this time that I saw him. It was just out of the corner of my eye, and if I'd been looking even slightly away I never would have noticed him, But he was there. I turned to look at him, and now he was walking away, around the corner and behind one of the other decrepit trailer homes. Briefly I thought my mind must be playing tricks, but I dismissed that. I knew what I had seen.
"Grandpa?" I whispered as I started to follow after him
Even as my mind tried to tell me he was dead, that it couldn't possibly be him I pushed on. I glanced both ways before crossing the pot-hole littered street. Was it possible I'd imagined it? I knew that, given everything that had happened over the last couple of days, I wasn't exactly in my right mind Neither one of my right minds, I mused but he'd looked so real. He'd been standing there and he'd been looking right at me. True it was starting to get dark out, and although my vision wasn't terrible it was far from perfect, but the look in his eyes had been one of recognition and Had it been fear?
Jon had been extremely close to his grandfather growing up. It was, in fact the reason that Jon had been sent the rock in the first place. He was somebody that grandpa trusted. Well done Grandpa, I thought bitterly. He'd been an excellent grandparent, spending time with Jon whenever he could, but apparently he hadn't been the best judge of character. Still, I couldn't help but look back on those memories with a certain fondness. They had been good times.
Besides, I mused as I stepped up onto the opposite sidewalk, he'd had experience with the rock. It had been his before I'd received it. Possibly, even though it was supposedly impossible, he'd be able to come up with a way to reverse the damage that I'd done. I finished my beer and tossed the bottle into some neighbor's yard. I would have felt bad about it if it looked like they would have cared in the least. Taking another drag from my cigarette, I rounded the corner of the block and looked on.
In the distance, just rounding another corner, I saw him. Well, with the sun going even further down and taking away it's light, I saw more of a shadow, but I was sure it was him.
"Grandpa!" I called out. He didn't seem to hear me. "Grandpa!" I repeated the call even louder this time, but if he heard it he didn't appear to take any notice. Why's he ignoring me? I picked up the pace a little, glad that I hadn't bothered to slip my shoes on. The sidewalk was littered with cracks and holes, and I wouldn't have been able to move very fast in those heels.
Now he'd gone around the next corner, and I picked my pace up into a slow jog. I had to catch him. I found myself thinking about Malcolm and what he'd told me the other day. He'd known my grandfather, in some capacity anyway. He wouldn't say anything, but I knew that he knew what happened to him as well. What did he tell me? Grandpa had tried to do something fundamentally wrong with the rock So, if everything I've done so far is a-okay with the cosmos, then what the hell qualified as fundamentally wrong? I was worried but I'd Well, Jon had known grandpa extremely well, and based on that I couldn't imagine him trying to do anything too terrible.
*Nothing like what I've done *
Before long, I was around the corner. I was too late though. My eyes combed the entire scene and there was no sign of him. "Grandpa!" I called out again in desperation. "Grandpa! Where did you go! I need your help!" There were a few people out and about, the typical groupings of teens that you tended to get in a place like this. They stopped for a moment, apparently distracted from their group walking, but they didn't really pay me much attention. I did here a couple of them snigger, but I didn't really care at the moment. I let loose a sigh of exasperation. *He's gone. Maybe he really is dead Maybe you imagined this *
*But *
"There you are," I turned around to see Rick standing behind me. He had a deep look of concern on his face. I have to admit I was kind of glad to see him. "You all right?" He asked.
"I'm fine," I said reluctantly. I cast one more backward glance in search of my missing grandparent, and started following him back home.
"You sure?" He asked, taking my hand. He really is sweet, I thought. "You were out here yelling for your grandfather " He sounded as though he had more to say, but he apparently wasn't entirely sure about how to continue.
I forced a smile and looked up at him, huddling against him as we walked to warm my body against the rapidly cooling evening air. "Yeah," I sighed, "I know what I was doing. Try to remember how much I drank last night though, and how much pot I smoked." I chuckled. "Think I might still be a little messed up."
He smiled back, and held me tighter as we rounded the corner. "As long as you're okay."
I stopped him, and turned to face him. "I'm fine," I told him. I leaned up and kissed him lightly on the lips, "But you're sweet to worry."
We made our way back to the trailer in a comfortable silence. You're really starting to like him, aren't you? I thought. And the truth was that yes, I think I was. It wasn't the most traditional romance in history. Not: Girl meet's Boy, Girl falls in love, Girl marries Boy *More like Girl meets boy, Girl wishes boy were bisexual, girl fucks boy * I thought with a half-hearted grin. All that I did know was that walking huddled up against him, I was starting to feel a little better.
I decided right then and there, as we made our way back to my new place, that things were going to go a little differently now. First of all, I'm done beating myself up! I made a mistake and, yes I royally fucked things up, but huddling up in a corner and crying about it like a little girl isn't going to fix that, is it? No, from now on, I'm going to move forward with confidence, and I'm going to fix this. I resolved right then and there that I was going to bring them back; Karyn, Sarah, Biff, Derrick, and Michelle. I'd done some major damage, but I knew that the key to fixing it lay in the rock in the bottom of my purse. There was a way.
There had to be.
Maybe it was the feelings I felt as I walked toward the steps to my home, or maybe in some strange way seeing my grandfather, imagined or not, had changed the way that I was feeling. Maybe it's a combination of the two. Either way, I was feeling quite a bit better. I decided to sit down on the step and have one more smoke before I went in. With Chloe in there I knew I couldn't indulge inside, nor would I have. Rick sat down beside me.
"You're a very interesting girl Natalie," he said as he leaned back.
"I think I'm really starting to like you Rick, but you know we shouldn't be dating. I'm sixteen, I'm a Sophomore in High School and you're like twenty." I paused, smiling. "We shouldn't be dating, and we definitely shouldn't be doing what we did earlier." I really didn't expect to change his mind, nor did I want to. It just felt like something that needed to be said.
"I won't tell if you don't?" he said with a mischievous grin.
That made me laugh. I smiled, looking over at him. Does that make him a creep? I wondered. The fact that he's dating a sixteen year old girl? Probably it did, but I found that I really didn't care. I mean, I'm not really going to look any older in two years, I thought. *It's not like I'm ten or twelve or anything like that * I wondered why I was trying too hard to justify it to myself. You like him, he likes you. Why can't you just leave it at that for the moment? I nodded softly. For once, my mind had had given me some good advice.
That was when the door opened. I saw Jill peeking down on us. "Hey Nat, while you were gone one of your friends called. Rachel? I think that's what she said her name was." I looked up.
"Thanks," I said. I looked at Rick. "Probably time to call it a night, huh?"
He smiled. "I suppose so except well, the thing is, I rode here with you guys. I don't really have a way to get home, and it's kind of a long walk "
I'd totally forgotten! "Um, yeah," I told him, "I'll see if I can use Jill's car and give you a ride home, but first I've gotta make a phone call." I kissed him on the cheek and made my way inside.
"I didn't think you had your license yet," he said.
"Don't worry, I will," I whispered under my breath. I walked over. Jill must have put Chloe in her room because the young girl wasn't out and about anymore. I decided to pour a glass of milk and picked up the phone. I flipped through the caller ID until I found Rachel's number. It rang a few times and then an older man's voice picked up.
"Is Rachel there?" I asked, realizing that I was probably talking to her father. He told me to wait just a second, and a moment later, I heard Rachel's voice.
"Hello."
"Rachel, it's Nat," I said. "Sorry it took so long to call you. I just had some things come up."
"That's okay," my friend said. "I'm just glad you finally did. We just finished dinner, and your call got me a nice little break from doing the dishes afterward."
"Nice timing on my part then," I quipped.
"So," she said, her voice a little softer, "How are you doing? You feeling any better than you were earlier?"
"Yeah," I told her, and for once it was an honest answer.
"Good," she said. "Were you still planning on coming over tonight?"
"Um," I paused. "Not sure I really have a ride." Truth be told, I really just felt like getting as much sleep as I could tonight, so that tomorrow I could start working on how to fix the wishes I'd made.
"Like you need a ride," she said, her voice going really quiet. "You promised you were going to bring the rock over tonight, and let me give it a try."
I almost dropped the phone. How the hell does she know about the rock? Well, now I really didn't have a choice. "Yeah," I told her. "I've gotta drop somebody off quick, and then I'll head over." I hung the phone up, not really listening to see if she had anything else to say. I downed my milk, and simply stood there for the moment.
Things just kept getting weirder and weirder
