Translation: "You're doing it wrong. I need to fix you," Sarah thought with a disgusted sigh, looking down and away from her mother's gaze. She figured her mom would be on her back and nagging sooner or later; there wasn't a snowball's chance the Old Sarah could change up her look and her everything without Susan McMillan having something snide and disapproving to passive-aggressively suggest about it. Narcissistic old has-been! I learned almost everything I know about fashion and makeup and etiquette and everything from you, but nooooo, that's not enough, is it? "Wear something more befitting a lady," "stop hanging out with such lowlifes," now it's "give up on the cheerleader dream," hm? No fucking wonder I'm never home and always out with my friends, maybe it's because I can't stand...!
"Honey, what's wrong?" Susan's worry abruptly broke Sarah's train of thought. She realized her eyes had started to water, and dammit, she was on the verge of crying, again! Stop that! Where's your resilience, Sarah!?
"N-nothing... it's nothing! Just... J-just leave me alone!" She'd have time to chastise herself for stuttering later; for then, she batted away her mother's embrace, ignored how hurt she seemed to look, and ran up to her room, slamming the door behind her. Then it was all about trying to force herself not to cry.
Okay, okay, relax. Relax! I dunno what the hell that was back there, with mom, but just put it out of mind. You don't need her! A pang of guilt throbbed in Sarah's chest. You can do it yourself. You don't need her approval, that's what your friends are for. You don't need her. She's just going to make it harder. You don't need her. You don't need her. You don't need her. Why the hell am I crying so hard!?
Not only had Sarah failed to calm herself down, but somehow, something about her mom and the way she was thinking about her was causing Sarah to just start bawling her eyes out. She didn't understand; there wasn't much love lost between Sarah and her mom... was there?
"Sarah?" There came a knock on her door. Time to get chewed out, Sarah thought miserably. Dear god, mom, please just let me have this! I know I shouldn't have done that, but right now...!
"Honey... you know I love you more than anything else in the world, right?"
Wait... what?
"You're my only daughter, baby; it kills me to see you upset like this! Don't think I haven't noticed; the ride back from the mall, what you did to your room last night, and now the cheerleaders thing... You're stressed and scared and upset, over I don't know what, and honey, I want to help! More than anything... But I can't do that if you don't tell me what's really going on, honey. Will you please let me in?" There wasn't a trace of anger in her voice.
Sarah didn't move, except to dry her face. Is this a trick? She thought in absolute disbelief. She can be manipulative, but... I didn't lock the door coming in, or anything...
When a long moment passed and Sarah still hadn't let her mother in, she could hear a long, sad sigh through the door. "I'll be in the kitchen, then, if you need me. I'll be whipping up something special to cheer you up, okay?" Footsteps led away from the door before Sarah had time to answer.
It was only supposed to be me and Kyla, Sarah thought, in awe. The only people in that bathroom that night were me and her. Just us. And NOT our parents! Sarah wondered, starting to figure it out. She doesn't seem to be aware of the change like Kyla and I were. Would it really completely shake up our entire home lives, indirectly, just because it changed us!? She shuddered; there was no knowing how deep the magic really went or how much it affected, now, if even other people's lives weren't off-limits. Relationships between people definitely aren't off-limits, Sarah thought, clutching her chest. It suddenly made much more sense why she'd felt so awful a moment ago; Kyla and her mother must have been on much better terms than Sarah and her own, before that night. And I just dissed her like that...
Sarah was conflicted. On one hand, apologizing for what really was an honest mistake was the right thing to do. Kyla's old conscience (that damn thing,) told her as much, and strongly. On the other hand, if she went to talk with her now, she'd probably have to explain about the switch and Kyla and her past life as a cheerleader and everything, and she really wasn't sure she was ready to do that yet, especially when she hadn't the mastery of Kyla's old voice. But... my own mother, though...?
A long moment passed.
Y'know what, fuck it, Sarah thought, caving into Kyla's conscience. What do I have to lose, anyway? She hopped off the bed and went to the kitchen, where Susan was washing apples.
"H-hey..." Sarah's mom stopped with the apples almost instantly. "I'm sorry... about earlier... but today, and the day before that... They've been kinda... insane... I didn't mean anything..."
"Thank you for that, honey." Soon enough, apple and corer still in hand, Susan had her arms thrown around Sarah, giving her the hug she looked like she so desperately needed. "And you know what, if you can't talk, or you don't think it'll make you feel any better, you don't have to. You're almost an adult now; I'm sure you can take care of yourself, whatever it is. Just don't forget you have your dear old mother to help you through it, okay?"
"I won't... Not anymore, I won't..." Sarah returned the hug as tightly as she could.
