Shortly Before
The breeze had picked up as Haru and Ken made their way home from school. When they'd decided to make a walk of it, it had been a crisp but gentle fall afternoon; now it was getting overcast, and even though the breeze wasn't particularly stiff, it was cold. Haru had figured out from talking to some people online that being smaller meant retaining less body heat, which was why she tended to get cold easier since her change, but this was beyond that; somehow it went right down to the bone. She pulled her jacket tighter and moved a little closer to Ken.
And then the breeze died off completely, more abruptly than it had started, and she still felt chilly. "C-cold," she muttered, half under her breath, glancing at the fox-boy and envying him the fur that covered his ears and tail.
Ken nodded. "It is, isn't it? I didn't think we were that close to winter yet."
"It isn't," she said, glancing around a little uneasily. It was so still out, now... There was the clock on the sign outside the credit union, an analog number that had an LED panel underneath it showing the temperature. It didn't look that far out of the normal range...but Haru found her attention fixed on the clock itself. It had a second hand, but...it wasn't moving. Had it broken? But the time was about right... She blinked, surprised, and suddenly it was moving again. A little startled and confused, she picked up the pace, Ken keeping stride with her.
"Let's just get you home," he said. "There'll be plenty of time to warm up inside."
She nodded.
Tiffany walked home in a bit of a daze. She'd decided to walk, again, to avoid the other students on the bus, but she was beginning to wish she'd ridden. Even though the markings on her skin were beginning to get itchy and luminous again, she wasn't feeling as warm as she normally did when they reacted to her clothes. It sure was brisk out...
But her thoughts were more on the events of the afternoon. She hadn't been pleased with the counselor's suggestion that she should re-establish herself in the school's social structure by serving other people; wouldn't that just encourage them to take advantage of her? But as much as she didn't like that idea, she'd gone and helped Zoe of her own free will, almost as a reflex, and...and she'd helped the slime-girl with her problem better than she would've thought to herself, and...she'd enjoyed it.
Tiffany had nearly forgotten the satisfaction of bringing order to the disorderly; though she'd thought about establishing herself as a force in the school in her first change, she'd been looking for satisfaction from the idea of imposing herself upon the others. Here, though...here, she'd spend her own time and effort to help Zoe with what she was trying to accomplish, and she'd actually found satisfaction in the work itself. Part of her still bristled at the idea that she'd wasted her time picking up after some klutz who just ran right into her, but...she wondered.
And then she stopped. A different feeling came over her; a vague unease, a feeling like there was somewhere she ought to be that wasn't where she was. But where? And why? What was it that she was supposed to be there for? She quickly ran over the day; she hadn't forgotten anything, there was nothing that needed doing that couldn't wait until she got home. But the feeling persisted. She didn't know why; was there something bad that would happen if she stayed where she was? Was there something she was needed for somewhere else? She didn't know. She didn't know, and she wanted to know, and she damn well wasn't going to go running off without...
...without...knowing... She didn't know, but it felt important. She didn't want to go running off into the unknown, but if it really was important...but why did it feel that way? She couldn't say; it just did. Tiffany bit her lip; if it really was important, then...maybe she should go anyway. Even if she didn't want to. But...go where? It was just a feeling, it wasn't as if she had directions...
Direction.
It was a kind of clarity washing over her, an almost physical jolt. It felt like it had felt when she sat down with Zoe and helped her pick up her things, telling her how to arrange it so that they could get things taken care of the best way. She hadn't intentionally observed the slime-girl's troubles and developed the solution, she'd just told her. This was like that, only far greater, a distilled sort of sensation that set a gentle throbbing in her head, starting at the base of her horn and traveling downward, like her whole neck and spine was a tuning fork. She knew where it was she was supposed to be and when.
And now her markings were really flaring up. Tiffany set off at a brisk jog, wishing she'd worn those stupid robes today.
Anneza cautiously opened the door of her parents' house, not sure whether they would be awake or not. She slipped inside quickly and shut the door behind her; the last thing she needed would be for her parents to get caught in the light and get stuck with some change as debilitating as hers. But for the moment, they seemed to be asleep, safe upstairs.
She flopped down onto the couch purposefully, pressing into the cushions the way gravity wouldn't do automatically anymore, and springing partway back the moment she relaxed her control, and stared at the ceiling. This was it, then. She had taken the few things that mattered, and she was going to sell her house, and she was going to move back in with her parents. She cringed at the thought; that was an idea with so many implications, of the foolhardy young adult who rushes into life without being prepared for it, and comes back a failure and lives in disgrace. But she wasn't young, or at least she hadn't been, and she'd been entirely ready for the challenges of the business world. The failure wasn't in being unprepared for that, it was...it was in everything else. She'd excelled at being a manager; she'd failed at being a person. And if there was any foolhardy rushing...it was in her rushing away from here, away from them.
Part of Anneza wanted to rail against the circumstances that had kept her inside, that had fed her paranoia, and to blame them for maybe influencing her into doing things she might not otherwise have done, but she'd been over all that before, too many times to count. There was no point in going over it again; the important question was where things would go from here.
Where could you go, from here? This would mean food and a place to sleep, and she might have some money from the sale of the house, if she was lucky. Since she didn't have a job, she'd certainly have time. Given all that, was it possible for her to...to become more of a person? To develop herself in...in...however? She could try some hobbies, she guessed, but would that do anything other than fill the time? What could you do if you discovered you just didn't like yourself?
Maybe...part of her recoiled at the idea, but maybe...her parents could help. She had spent so many years trying not to be what they had hoped she'd be, and look where it had got her. She still didn't want to just...just completely give up her own autonomy, or anything, but...with all the things they'd tried to tell her over the years, maybe in some ways...maybe they were right.
Maybe, given time-
STOP.
Shortly After
Lilly sniffed, still upset, though her tears were dying down. She didn't understand - why did that man have to tell her this was a trick? How could it be? Everything seemed so real, and she was finally going to get to do something...be something more than just...just some little squirrel-girl. Why did he have to bother her with these silly questions? Why did he have to try and take this away from her? If only...if only she could just make him go away and leave her alone...make him go away, like...like with...
-you can't do that!
She winced at the echo of that voice in her mind. She didn't want to have to make that boy disappear, to forget him, but he just...just wouldn't let her be, wouldn't let her be happy...what else was she supposed to do? If she forgot him, she wouldn't have him making her feel bad, and she could be with her new friends and not have to worry about anything at all...it was the only way!
What would Mom think?
The squirrel-girl let out a little gasp at that. That wasn't something he had said before! But that was his voice...she hadn't forgotten him, even though she wanted to...and...and...what would Mom think? Didn't her mom want her to be happy? And wouldn't it make her mommy happy if she got to grow up like her and be a mommy herself someday? Her mom loved her, didn't she? So if this was the only way for her to be happy...
...but...her mom loved him, too, back when he was her...or she was him? What would she think? If...if she knew...if she ever found out...would her mom hate her? Would she think it was like she had...had...
"Sh-shuddup!" she stammered, leaving Cecilia to wonder who she was talking to. She tried to ignore the idea, tried to focus on being the magical girl that she finally got to be...tried to forget...
