While Lydia ranted on and on about the festivities at her house not being a party, Scott was pulled aside by a fabulous-looking underwear model named Paul.
"Dude, how's it hangin?" Scott greeted him.
"Who is this?" screamed Lydia. "I don't know him! Get out! This is not a party!"
"Oh, not too bad," Paul replied. "That department store deal with K. D. Nickels seems to have petered out but my agent is working on a national shoot for Hanes. This party, though; it's awesome! I mean, I heard them talking about it on the radio, so I figured it must be cool, but I never expected this! There must be hundreds of people outside!"
"It's not a party!" Lycia continued to scream. "Go home! Everybody go home!"
As fate would have it, that's when three of Ludia's usual co-conspirators chose to arrive: Estella Goodacre, Shawanda Muysenberg, and Zulema Zimmiyotti.
"Lydia, you scum!" Zulema accused. "You told us this was going to be a bust. But NoooOOO! It's one of the best! Why didn't you want us around?"
"It was supposed to be a bust," Lycia cried. "But then these two assholes brought a few hundred of their closest friends with them, plus the band, and the searchlight, and the rides, and... shit! Where did those concession and foods trucks come from?"
"Hey, it all looks great to me," Shawanda stated.
"What about these guys with pussies? Were they supposed to be a bust too or are they for real?" Estella demanded.
"They're real. There's four of them: Jon, Joseph, Alan, and Jeff," replied Lydia, slowly regaining her composure.
"I mean, you're parents are still out of the country, right?" Shawanda asked.
"So, which ones are you?" Estella asked Sandy and Dale.
"I saw your photo spread in the Sunday paper," Zulema told Paul.
"No, there's supposed to be home in half an hour!" Lydia wailed, once again losing control.
"Where are the guys with pussies?" Shawanda asked Jeff.
"I wish a circus complete with elephants, horse, clowns, and showgirls would show up," said Jon.
"Martha, have you looked outside?" ome of the neighbors asked his wife.
"George, these two boys want to use our bathroom. Do you suppose that would be OK?" she replied.
