Alojz's profile

I'm really tempted to add to this line again, but I'll be honest I find it SOOO difficult to write for such extensive memory manipulation (mostly because it's really difficult to imagine myself in that position)

Aw stop it, I'm blushing 😅

Not much happens in the two additions tbh, mostly setting the scene for things happening 🙃

I've written this in first person, past tense, as Jon/Allison just because I personally find that kind of writing easiest to get immersed to. I don't mind if any follow up stories are written differently - whatever works for you!

Also, I was hoping to word Ryder's wishes quite carefully to make sure that their outcome isn't Jon/Allison loosing her trepidation of the situation or just becoming blindly obedient to his whims. Hopefully there's still plenty of scope for internal conflict with the effects of the wish!

Just FYI you should really implement the option to delete accounts unless you want some rando to come along and sue you under some data protection and control law.

Awesome! What did you enjoy about it in particular?

Ok, so the busyness has piled up way higher than I anticipated. I will get to this though!

Yeah I'll do it. I'm just a bit short on time lately but might get to it on Sunday.

As for the stone - I'm well aware that if Jon keeps the stone with him, the moment the 20 mins pass he will try to remedy his situation. So I was thinking that his plan is, as you also mentioned, to wish the stone away to his 'nephew' the new Jon. Maybe even with a proviso that Sue is excluded from the blanket memory adjustment happening when wishes are made, just so that he can stay aware of anything the new Jon might be up to with the stone. This way, "the way out" would be simultaneously close enough to give Jon/Sue some direction to their actions while also not being so close it's too easy for them to find a way out.

And while I do see the appeal of David getting the hold of the stone I honestly feel like that might remove the attention from Jon really sinking into Sue's life. Instead we'd just keep escalating things instead of really exploring the emotional and practical landscape of how things have worked out. Sure, wishing is fun, but it's the consequences of those wishes that are the interesting bit! Ultimately, what I'd ideally like to see is Jon getting defeated in a "Fuck. I guess this is my life now." way. Shit but stable.

Lot's of interesting thoughts there! And I'm really enjoying having this discussion - it's getting me even more hyped to see where things will go with this story.

> NGL, I actually have quite a few uncertainties and reservations about writing through what said end state actually is in all its gory detail. In the abstract, as it is now, it's great, mostly defined by a vague feeling of impending regrets, lowkey sexual abuse, and that sweet TG angst, buuuut when that sort of thing becomes concrete and we actually have to have Sue living it I'm not convinced its actually gonna be quite like that.

It's fair enough that you have your hesitations about the post-masochist-stage of the story. I can totally see how just writing Sue's Slice-of-Life might be not that fun if we're deprived of the novelty of the experience of Jon putting himself on a trajectory to being her. Not only that but I can totally see how it could get depressing and boring. So in that way, similarly to you I also thought that once Jon is completely replaced by Sue we can just drop the curtain and say "And so he/she lived kinda unhappily ever after"..

That said, imho, Jon doesn't become Sue at the moment he passes the 20 minute mark. At that point he only gains two of her characteristics - not being interested in masochistically designing a regretful life for himself/herself and not finding the female body sexually attractive. There'd be still plenty of other elements of 'Sueness' that Jon needs to acquire. And one of his previous wishes made sure it would happen at various points over the next 24 hours. Also, he still retains his own memories as his main memory set, so for full intents and purposes I consider him Jon, albeit with an increasing number of Sue's mental characteristics that he has to get used to.

The way I see the story go, could be essentially split into two phases: the remainder of the wishtravaganza 20 minutes, and then a day or so of Jon's journey of descending into Sue, the horror and struggle of trying to come to terms with the kind of fate he foolishly choose, as different aspects of her life start manifesting in him one by one. Kinda like a roller-coaster which starts with being pulled to the highest point, and then launches you into the wild experience of the unknown of the ride.

> he starts acting rationally, it means masochistic sexy fun times'll be over

Sure. And who says that's a bad thing? It might be not fun for Jon any more but it can still be fun for us, the readers and writers. I, for one, would love the story to take a darker turn once Jon realises just how much he has fucked himself over and that there is pretty much no way out. Not because I like to see people suffer, but rather that's how I'd design my own magical TG experience if I had the power to do so. Like, honestly, most if not all of the wishes I'll make Jon wish upon himself in this storyline are something I'd wish upon myself when designing my perfect future life. Even with the full awareness that once my current high is over there will be only regret left. Maybe even because I know that regret will be there. The only thing I'd change was I wouldn't make myself a MILF but instead a naive, young woman, still not used to what womanhood means and thinking of herself mostly as a girl. But hey, that was dictated by the starting conditions of this storyline so I won't argue.

Yeah I understand what you're getting at and I believe it's got a lot to do with the common belief that a story has got to have some sort of arc, with the characters being actively driven towards a something, either to escape a predicament or to accomplish a goal. And while I agree that that's the case for most writing, I think it's not absolutely necessary. There is plenty of writing out there that's pretty light on (or completely lacking) plot and instead focusing on something else - world-building, poetic prose, being a vehicle for the authors philosophical discussions, you name it. With erotica, I'd argue that the principle goal is not necessarily telling a compelling story but rather getting the audience off (and indeed getting the author off). That's not to say that there is no well-plotted TG TF fiction out there, because there certainly is. I'd just say that it's not a requirement.

One could even argue (i.e. I will) that when someone's fetish involves wanting to experience the feeling of total and absolute helplessness, then the protagonist can't be allowed to have a goal to pursue. A goal gives hope for change, and so kinda cancels out the hopeless helplessness. At most, the goal could be the protagonist trying to figure out their place in their new situation and somehow come to terms with it. So an internal journey rather than an external one.

@broom11 I though the exact same thing. Though judging by the pit of depravity that is our humble company I wouldn't count on Jon being left in peace too much ;)

Hey, so I see that you've set this up in the direction of Jon ending up being this permanently horny thing, where most of his misery comes from just needing release too much. To be honest this is a little mutually exclusive with a pretty prominent kink of mine - feeling sexualised even when NOT in the mood. I think I'll write a sister episode to this one rather than continuing here but that decision has not come lightly cause I think it'd be awesome to keep collaborating. So if you feel like adding to that other one maybe we can find a common ground later on?

Amazing. It's so good to have an encouragement to write more in a form of other people contributing. It's good to have some kind of proof that I wouldn't be writing just for myself.

Expect an episode or two from me later today. Hopefully this will be a start of a new flurrry of additions to the dramatic retelling of Jon's exceptionally misguided decisions!

Hey @Cork, are you still planning to add the 5 episodes or is this up for chiming in now?

Oh and don't worry, you were definitely right in seeing the foreshadowing of more discomfort on the boob side of things ;)

The desire to add to this story comes and wanes for me. I mean, I keep thinking about it but whenever I've got actual time to indulge in TGTF fiction I seem to be mostly catching up on my RPs haha.

One thing I for sure know would help to motivate me is knowing that I wouldn't be the only one adding to this. I feel that knowing exactly how the story will go, just allows me to play it out in my head so I feel less need to put it down in writing. Other people's contributions introduce enough of the unexpected to make it worthwhile.

I actually almost added a thing there recently but my browser crashed when I was writing it and then the mood was gone.

Is there anything in particular you're hoping for here?

Good to know! Different people have different styles of contributions. I for example like when people actively add to mine because it makes it a bit less predictable for me!

Really enjoying this @Cork. How do you feel about people chiming in?

Oh yeah, I can totally take on the chapter where Jon acquires Sue's attitude to her own femininity. That said, I'd be keen to still have several episodes of him to setting up some more "perks"/"traps" for his future life, while wondering if he should or shouldn't go for it. Personally I have two in mind I've been thinking about for a while now that I wouldn't like us to miss!

I mean, at the least, he might have made sure that Sue's not attracted to women but he's not specified anything about his attraction to men so that would need to be taken care of. I'm pretty keen for scheduling that transition to happen a little after David has returned home. It would let us have both some juicy awkward time when his husband appears home while Jon is still as attracted to him as he would be as a boy. And then I'd love to have an episode dedicated to him just anxiously counting down the seconds until Sue's heterosexuality and appreciation of her life partner kicks in, with it hitting him like a bag of bricks.

@Enjeubleu what do you think about changing the narration to first person pov?

Excellent choice.

Or her?

So something like her, more like her, or her?

Struggled to sit under tables? How do you mean?

Btw I was planning to let Jon get away with this one. You seemed not to spare him 😉

Great to see you add to this! Maybe it inspired me to return as well ;)

How large were you thinking for Sue's hips? Like, your episode conveys that they're generally larger but if you were to be more specific? I don't mean I need measurements in terms of inches more just I'd hate to write followups where I incorrectly assume Jon's new figure is narrower or wider than you have imagined it here.

> What he means to ask for and what he gets are likely to be different things.

Yup, totally. Or he knows that he's asking for something kinda shit (being the masochist he is) but doesn't realise just how bad it'll be to actually live with it.

I'm struggling a bit to come up with ways to prevent him making clarifying wishes fixing things without removing the way of wishing from him altogether.

@aashen don't worry, it was mostly a joke - you assumed correctly and I am a man. I just spent quite a lot of time thinking about what those things would really feel like!

BTW which "misinterpretations" do you mean?

Also, are you assuming I'm a guy?

@aashen What did you enjoy about my work?

In a way I envy you.. You've got so much to discover still! I think I've largely seen all that is of interest to me :/

Not directly relevant, but seeing this episode reminded me of this storyline from a long while ago - https://fictionbranches.net/fb/story/8340

I think you might enjoy it.

I'm glad you are liking it. Feel free to pick up from this point on. I think I'm about to need to take a bit of a break form writing.

I like both. I expected I'd be more into the one where Jon is getting his horny guy hat on but honestly, there is something hot about the idea that he might have finally realised that he's done something kinda fucked but, but its now too late to leave this roller coaster...

Ah I can't wait until it comes out!

Maybe. I want you to get your self-study addition in first though.

BTW, are you interested in external contributions here too?

Also, @Perri, thanks for your addition! It's definitely much appreciated but I might continue this thread branching of this episode instead of the new one. I think flashbacks of backstory break the flow a bit for me. Would definitely welcome some additions in the main timeline!

Hi Perri, Thanks for good words!

> if you're going to focus almost exclusively on the fetishistic aspect of a story, your story paints itself into a corner quickly.

Yeah I know. But to be honest I'm personally not too concerned about having much story arch or plot development. This is just a fetish thing for me, so I'm only focusing on that aspect. Though, I would definitely welcome additions from other people that develop plot in some ways, or introduce constraints I have to operate in.

Secondly, I also second the need for a bit of time and opportunity for Jon to experience the physical differences he's forced himself to deal with. I mean I don't know exactly how big his breasts are, but in his original wish he asked for Josephine to be 'busty' so I'd imagine suddenly having a handful of inert flesh hanging of each of his pecs would feel like something? Also, the wish included a 'huge butt' but there is only one mention of him finding his thighs 'cushiony' when he sits on the floor. I imagine that suddenly having a sizeable behind would be more noticeable than that? And then there's obviously the fact that he's much shorter (which will probably show most when he's around other people), and generally smaller and weaker as a woman.

Like Cicuta, I would really like some of the next wishes to include sexy "enhancements". Though my personal preferences are for things which are firmly more of a curse than a blessing - and I struggle to imagine why a person like Josephine would actually wish e.g. her breasts to be bigger and more uncomfortable, seeing as most 'busty' women actually want their boobs to be less in the way.

Firstly, just wanted to chime in to say I really, really like the way you imagined the involuntary wishes come into force. Those brief vignettes of Jon's complete erasure in favour of Josephine, just for a wish to happen - it's conveys a sense of pretty exciting terror of being no longer in control of things.

@aashen good point about the name inconsistency! I'll modify the episodes to fix that.

Hah, thanks aashen! I don't think I can offer much quality in writing when it comes to plot of dialogues, but I do put great care in making my writing descriptive for the specific purpose of people being able to picture well what the main character is going through.

I don't really have anything as such planned other than just taking it in the general direction of what I'd wish for to realise my own "masochistic transformation" fantasies...

Would be quite happy for other people to chime in and start contributing!

No worries! I've been thinking of continuing this but I wasn't sure if anyone would actually enjoy it so I'm glad to hear you'd be up for reading/writing(?) more!

Hi Perri, I'm really enjoying this thread. Reality modifications are some of my favourite transformations out there. There are just so wonderfully and terrifyingly... complete. The victims really can't escape at all. Do you have a vision of where you'd want this story to go or do you mind me joining for a little collaboration?

I second that this is a great story. The only thing I wish was different was that mental changes were not explicitly disallowed in one of the first original wishes. I'm tempted to circumuent it by writing an episode where Sarah makes some changes to Jon's brain - I guess it's something that's physical. It wouldn't overwrite who Jon is, but might give him some new thoughts or feelings - which works for me cause I'm not a fan of identity death anyway.