Becoming Part of the Team

I wasn't sure if I could get away with wearing the rock on a chain during practice, but then I noticed one of the other girls wearing a pendant around her neck. Now my only problem was finding a chain. It only took me a second to realize that i didn't have to search for one, I could make one. "I wish I had a chain, a jewelery chain, that I could use to hang my rock around my neck." I was glad I had specified what kind of chain, as it might be hard to explain some sort of prison-type heavy chain to the other girls. ("Other girls?" Great. Now I was automatically thinking of myself as a girl.) Fortunately I got what I wanted and was able to keep the rock close to me as Karyn and I joined the rest of the team heading out to the field to practice, gossiping with each other about boys and clothes and whatnot as we did so. It just seemed so, well, natural. The practice started and it was a disaster! I just couldn't seem to do anything right - I "forgot" the words to cheers the team had been doing all year, was out of position during routines, and just generally messed everything up. Karyn seemed to be having problems too, but nowhere near as bad as me. It might not have been so bad except that the other members of the team started yelling at me. It seemd they were dedicated to being perfect cheerleaders so the team could win an upcoming competition. One even went so far to say "My god Jonnie, it's like you've never done this before!" She didn't know how right she was! Finally it got to be too much and I started to cry. I just couldn't help myself. Most of the girls seemed embarrassed for me but Karyn came over to comfort me. "It's OK Jonnie. Don't cry, it's nothing you need to worry about." "But, but, . . . I'm ruining it for everyone. I just wish I could be as dedicated and talented as the rest of the team." I was so busy sobbing that I didn't remember I had the rock next to my skin until . ..