"... that all women ages 18 to 40 were required to not wear clothing from the waist down and had to have unprotected sexual intercourse with a least three men they have never had sex with before. I wish that this holiday was known as "Genetic Diversity Day" and that the vast majority of people accepted it as necessary to promote healthy DNA diversity in the human gene pool. Oh, I also wish that sexually transmitted diseases never existed!"
After the stone granted Jon's wish, Jon went to bed and anxiously awaited the next day's holiday festivities!
