This is NON-CANON. An omake where characters might act different, weird or just plain silly. I hope not to offend anyone, and this might even be added to for the sake of funny later on, by anyone. I repeat, this is NOT supposed to be a serious branch, and this is NOT supposed to bother anyone, guide the story in any specific direction or promote any points of view.
The Enemy finally found a way to solve the Lucas problem.
It took time and energy, but they created Lucas's dark clone. A being just like Lucas, but faithful to them...
The Moon, Lucas's plot.
The dark angel appeared in front of Lucas.
"Sorry, good twin, but they sent me here to kill ya."
Lucas didn't even get up.
"How much are they payin' ya?" - She said, calmly sipping her can of soda.
Her dark twin paused.
"Paying? Nothing..."
"Okay. I'll see that and raise you a crate of Dr Pepper, three burritos and the number of this sexy elf chick I know..."
Enemy base
The dark angel attacked its creators with fury and glee. Amid the destruction, one of the nondescript beings, in its desperation, yelled out.
"WHOSE STUPID IDEA WAS THAT???"
It got an answer.
"EVERYONE'S! WE'RE NOT INDIVIDUALS!"
For the Enemy had indeed managed to create a being like Lucas in all aspects. Including that of being a freelance.
They forgot a detail.
A freelance's faithfulness is dirt cheap.
"YES, I TURNED EIGHTEEN THIS MONTH, BUT I'M NOT GONNA DO IT, YOU FUCKING CREEP!!!"
Karyn grabbed the cat-man with her tentacles. Cass glared at him, holding a mallet she had pulled from hammerspace.
"But hentai is profitable, and besides you already have the anime field and the tentacles!" - Said the cat-man.
Three of the aforementioned tentacles began wrapping around his neck.
Adam walked around Edward, the ship-lady. On the inside, she looked very much like a ship from Pirates of the Caribbean...
Adam gasped as she looked at one of the crates.
"Edward!!"
"Yes?" - Said Edward - "Did you find treasure in me?" - She asked, intrigued.
"Even BETTER!!!"
A few hours later
Adam sat and held the bottle with her claws, giggling.
"Yo ho ho, and a bottle of rum..."
Dennis and Effie explored the Internet, with Dennis guiding. Suddenly, another digital faerie came out of a node. She looked filthy, as if she had played in mud for three hours straight. Effie blinked, looking at the direction she came from.
Dennis just shook his head.
"Effie, in this node, always remember to go the other way. For that way..." - Dennis pointed the path the other faerie had just come from - "That way, Effie, lies 4-chan..."
Effie nodded sagely.
"Did I understand this correctly?" - Said Hawkins.
"Yes, you did. You know our agency owes Lucas a favor, and, well, she just collected." - Said the person in the other line.
"Very well." - Said Hawkins - "Cecilia, I need you to look up online a few items and services...
Hawkins looked at the things and people gathered in front of him that night. Three cans of orange paint, eight Asian men, a bag with three pounds of raw cookie dough, a red-haired professional gardener and nineteen decks of cards.
Hawkins nodded.
All is ready. - he thought.
"Very well. I assume you all know your roles?" - He said, cool as usual.
The people nodded.
"Begin mission." - Hawkins said.
I really hope I get to keep THIS mission secret. - He thought.
Cecilia smiled as she filmed it.
This is SO gonna go on Youtube... - She thought.
"So, there you have it, Father Maxwell... I am unsatisfied with my previous job, I feel like I wasted so much..." - Said Anneza, as her doll friend helped with interpreting.
The tree-changed priest pondered.
"I believe you may have found your answer, then. Now all that you must do is find out the field you would really love..."
After the doll relayed Maxwell's comments, Anneza nodded.
"That's right." - She said - "I never wanted to be a news corporation executive... I always wanted to be... A LUMBERJACK!"
I may have made a huge mistake... - Thought Maxwell.
