Jon sat on his bed and closed his eyes, wondering just how far his power could reach. He quickly detected his parents in the next room, and Zoe down the hall. Even though he couldn't see them, he could sense what they were doing and how they were feeling. It felt like a vibration, a wave - but one he could immediately understand and interpret. Not exactly hearing their thoughts, but something like it. Zoe, despite her speech impediment, was worried about the homework she hadn't done. His parents - now vibrating in perfect harmony - were perusing the closet, considering their outfit for the day. But there was something else.
Beyond the walls of his house, there was even more buzzing. It was loud, cacophonous, and difficult to focus on. But he tried. The noise was coming from every direction - it was almost overwhelming, but Jon took another deep breath and focused on it. It was like listening to a symphony and trying to pick out an individual instrument. Challenging, but not impossible to a trained ear.
He listened for patterns, rhythms - each vibration was unique, and once he locked on to the timbre of each one they began to emerge clearly. He found Mrs. Baird, the old lady down the street. He found his history teacher, Mr. Walford. The more he listened to the noise, the easier it became, like picking faces out of the crowd. But whose face should he pick out?
That was easy. It was the one who was always picking on him. The asshole who seemed to live to make his life a living hell. Well, today was about to get a lot more interesting for Steve Farber. He sifted through all the waves around him, and quickly locked on. Just like he had with his family, Steve's presence was suddenly much more clear, standing out above all the other vibrations.
But this was a bit more difficult. Steve lived on the other side of town, and like a distant radio signal there was lots of interference. Way too much for Jon to do what he wanted. He needed a clearer connection. It would take too long for Jon to go over there. And he didn't have Steve's number. But then another idea came. He had just enough clarity to get one subtle idea out over the air. Seconds later, Jon's phone was ringing.
"Hey Steve!" Jon answered with excitement.
"Jon?"
"Well, you called me..."
"Right. I guess I did." Suddenly, Jon's connection was crystal clear. It felt almost like they were in the same room. Now he could get to work.
"So, what did you call me to talk about?"
"I... I don't remember. I'm confused."
"I'm sorry to hear that," Jon replied with a compassionate tone. "But I guess it's easy to be confused with a name like yours."
"What do you mean?"
"Oh, don't tell me you've forgotten your name."
"Huh? Steve. Steve Farber. But folks call me 'the Stud.'"
"No they don't. Try again."
"Um..." Steve went silent as he thought. "Oh yeah! People call me 'Princess!'"
"Steve 'Princess' Farber? That doesn't sound right."
"No, silly! Candi 'Princess' Ditzfield!"
"Oh, that's right! Now I definitely now why you're confused. That's a very odd name for the biggest jock at school."
"I dunno. That's just the name I've always had. I'm still the all-state quarterback, and you're just a shitty little dweeb. I don't even know why I bothered calling you."
"Well, Candi," Jon said, now angered by Steve's little outburst. "I think you're still confused. That's not the name of a star quarterback. That's the name of the prissiest bimbo in town. In fact, you're going to be late for school today. But that's okay, because you're going to spend all morning shopping for the sexiest, girliest outfits you can find. Forget about football, cars, and all that jock bullshit. You need to make sure you look as hot as possible for all the guys at school."
"OMG, you're so right, Jonny! I can't believe I was, like, so mixed up. You're so sweet for helping me out! I can't wait for you to see the cute outfit I pick out today!"
Jon's face was starting to hurt from all the grinning. Today was going to be awesome.
