Jon woke up on the couch. He briefly hoped that he'd been dreaming. Lifting his head confirmed that wasn't the case. His whole family was standing around the living room, still all dressed like his mother. Mikey was now there too, wearing the same lady's business suit. They all wore the same expression, too. A look of worried concern that mothers are so good at producing.
His mom... his real mom, spoke up first.
"Are you okay, honey? You fainted a second ago."
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a head rush." Jon knew he needed to find Eric and Keith. They just had to be behind this. "I've gotta go," Jon said, standing up.
"I don't think so," his dad said, placing a manicured hand on his shoulder, guiding him back to laying on the couch, "You're not going anywhere just yet."
"But I-"
"No buts, young man," Mikey interrupted. "We're your mother, and you're staying put until we know you're okay."
"What do you mean 'we'?" Jon asked. They all looked at him, confused.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Zoe asked "You haven't been doing drugs, have you?"
"No way! I'm not the one who's messed up. Look at the way you're all dressed!"
"What's wrong with our outfit?" Jon's dad said, "We always dress like this at the office. How else would you expect a professional woman to dress?"
"But you're not a woman, dad!"
"Of course we are. And what's a 'dad'?" he asked with genuine confusion.
Mikey picked up the phone and started dialing. "I'm calling Doctor Wilson," he said.
"Good," Zoe said. "Jon, just lay back and relax. The doctor's coming over and we're going to figure this out."
But Jon didn't need a doctor. What he needed was to get out of this house and find Eric and Keith. He had to think of a way to convince his messed up family that he was healthy so they'd let him leave.
