I walked north with Adam. Soon Joseph and Jeff had vanished in the distance, and we were completely alone, on the beach. Adam soon took my hand and said, "Jon, remember last month at the party? We weren't naked then, but...."
I had wished that I would know what my new history was like, so I knew just what was supposed to have happened, even though I didn't remember being there personally. Adam and myself had been dating for months, on and off. At that party, I was sitting on his lap and he was putting his hand down my half-unzipped pants. He massaged my female parts and I didn't resist him. I had started giggling like a girl, but we hadn't gotten any farther than that.
"Yeah, I remember," I said. "I wasn't sure if we should go all the way. It didn't seem like a good idea then."
"But I so wanted to," he said. Obviously he was coming on to me heavily. I wasn't really attracted to him--while I didn't mind dating guys, I wasn't attracted to them either. Okay, maybe I was a little bit, from hormones. But on the other hand, I couldn't help but wonder what it was like to use my vagina, now that I had it. Of course, Adam had no condoms and sex could have bad consequences, but the physical ones, at least, would be easy enough to wish away.
What should I do, I wondered?
