Don't delete your comments! I take no offense. I've always appreciated your contributions. And to be completely honest I didn't even think about the skirt lol. I just tried to write it as filler text because I like to roughly match word length when contributing. I'm just glad you said you enjoyed it and added to it. I'd much rather you say something even if it's a critique instead of not commenting.
By MorphoHex -
On A lot happens in little moments.
I should say two things. First, this is fictionbranches do whatever. 2. I meant the skirt felt a little unreasonable, like would she really wear something that short? and excuse me if I came off rude. I was actually coming to delete my comment because I changed my mind, but alas.
By Marazh-no -
On A lot happens in little moments.
Thanks for the feedback! I'm not sure about the "whore assumption". Do you mean the mom part? I just meant for the mom to be upset that Esme was being messy. Or if you mean the assumption that the stone was a vibrator, I can understand that. The interpretation is flexible anyway- can just chalk it up to a mom not understanding her teenage daughter very well, and not that Esme would definitely use one. ^_^
By MorphoHex -
On A lot happens in little moments.
I enjoyed this but the only thing I will critique is don't get the assumption that she's a whore. I don't think Mikey would find the hot but perhaps approaching that line. She's not a parody of a woman just very hot. It at least that's how I've tried to portray it.
By Marazh-no -
On A lot happens in little moments.
good timing with that comment, 39 minutes before I posted another chapter. However, it's broken up into key checkpoints rather than one long story that runs to completion, precisely because I wanted someone else to jump in in the middle and put in their own chapter. Don't just sit there as a spectator, saying "I hope you write more". If you want the story to go a certain way, you're supposed to write it, at any point. Take a whack at it.
By Thisisnota Realname -
On The Truth
did write this nearly 15 years ago dude. The original idea was the undos would stack, so it'd get more complicated to reverse things if he kept changing things too much. but i never wrote deep enough to do that, i used the swaps as the the trigger for narrative elementss rather than the narrative itself.
By
Brayn -
I'm pretty sure that the way this is worded, that it should be like "undo" in notepad, as opposed to, say, ms paint. In other words, if you do 3 trades, and then say "you can have it back" 3 times, it won't undo the 3, it will just undo the last one, redo the last one, and undo the last one again. But I guess the writer didn't understand that and continued to write as if it worked as he intended. If he was wishing with a real magic wish granting item, he would be a clueless protagonist who doesn't understand the real implications of his wish.
By Thisisnota Realname -
opzione 1
By LadyViolence -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
interesting so far. hope to see more.
By funfun74 -
On The Truth
Since the comments are 50/50 I'm voting indecision. Maybe that'll teach Jon to take the stone more seriously for the next question :)
By MorphoHex -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
Option 1
By 1701746561701 -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
2 gotta break that tie
By Eldridge -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
Option 1, cause I'm evil and want indecision.
By B.Dragon -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
Option 2!
By kfizzle -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
Option 2, his mom would at least get some of her life and energy back. Though of course, there's no way of telling how it could cascade...
By Zorak -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
Option 2
By Anakin -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
Option 1
By
ZamZam -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
Option 1
By PhoenixHull -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
Vote Now! I'm doing something a little different with this branch: Comment whether you want to see Option 1 or Option 2 (or indecision!) as the next episode. You've got until the weekend. Choose carefully, Jon can't undo it!
By
Matisguy -
On Option 2: Down the Rabbit Hole
This is a game over episode mostly for demonstration purposes. The other branch is the one I intend to continue, but I wanted to show the reader a binary choice at least once.
By
Matisguy -
On Option 1
I was lowkey hoping that Jon's thoughts about getting fucked by a man would alter how the remote works. Since what Jon considers "sexy" has seemingly changed (or at least expanded - maybe s/he's just bi now), I expectrd the accidental uses in this chapter to either A) turn Zoe into a guy or B) give her a dick and make her a futa, giving Jon the "real experience" he craved.
A potential idea for future chapters, maybe? Maybe Jon could wish for either a 2nd remote or for his existing remote to also have a switch to flip between "sexy woman" and "sexy man" changes (since he specified the number of buttons, he can't just add a second set of + and - in, say, a different color)?
By Zelo -
On Jon's fucked
Just a heads-up: this story is the kind of thing that The Drafting Board was added to the site for. You can continue on here if you'd like, but in the future you might look at adding your work in The Drafting Board if it's something that doesn't directly follow from one of the three current root branches.
By
Ms. Cork -
On James
Thank you for the recommendations. It's working well now
By thisguy10101 -
Well earlier Jon still remembered the change even though Zoe was pressing the button and Zoe didn’t notice. So Jon should remember it
By Endless -
On Next Day
Make sure you've got Javascript turned on. If that's not the issue, try clearing your cookies and refreshing the page.
By
Ms. Cork -
Welp, guess that's an open ending for sure.
A great story overall, and as any great story does, it too must come to an end.
By Zelo -
On Epilogue
Really?
You should take more, then.
By
Matisguy -
I mighta taken to much Adderall...
By Marazh-no -
Wonder with Jon not having the stone currently on him if Zoe will be tempted to use the stone either on Mikey to keep him and his friends under control or on Jon so things don’t get out of hand.
By Endless -
I edited it.
By Marazh-no -
Would the next person in the cycle receive the stone immediately(after the first person in the cycle) or is it around six hours since it isn’t really made clear
By Endless -
I love your contributions to the site. I generated some art of what I thought Esme would currently look like based on your descriptions: with shirt, without, without and full body. If you don't want this please let me know and I'll gladly delete it, I just love being able to visualize creative authors' works!
By MorphoHex -
(Wow, 2018... imagine if this was taking place in 2025!)
By
Catfish -
Wait... Is this... An ending?
Don't see a lot of those around here, Bravo!
By
Matisguy -
On Settling In
This is a very fun branch. Excited to see what's next.
By Marazh-no -
some of the best writing on this website.
By Marazh-no -
This is really good.
By Marazh-no -
On Quick call
Best branch!
By Marazh-no -
As if the changes couldn't have gotten any more drastic... 😨
By Zelo -
On Sarah's Plan
I guess that makes sense. "Being an only child" is a binary state and thus the only way someone could be "worse" at being an only child is by not being an only child at all.
By Zelo -
It’s been longer than a week. Day 1, Jon tells Karyn about the stone. Day 2, Karyn becomes Jon’s dick. Days 2-8, Karyn thinks she’s always been a dick. Morning day 9, the wish ends and Karyn remembers she’s a person. Days 9-10, Jon and Karyn try to find a new sense of “normal.” Day 11, Jon reverses Karyn’s transformation, but Karyn realizes how much she enjoyed it. Morning day 12, Karyn makes a wish that makes her a penis again but only she remembers it this time. Jon also makes a misspoken wish and becomes Jen. We are now starting up on day 13, and Jon/Jen will not regain his/her memory of Karyn until day 19. But who knows what else will have changed by the time that day comes around?
By ekempo5000 -
Just for reference if you made it this far and are a bit confused:
Jon => Sarah
Sarah => Zoe
Zoe => Michelle
By
Matisguy -
On Sarah's Plan
So, does that mean that Jon now has a better sister? Maybe he has two, excellent sisters to beat Sarah's one?
By Great Sage -
Wow, that was intense.
By Goryu -
On After-Party and Sarah's Revenge
so confused, how long is a week in this world
By Nickolas -
Exactly
By
Ms-Scarlett-Raven -
Why the bold? Just to highlight it?
By The Guest -
I don't see how also being an only child can make Jon better than Sarah
By Xiphium -
On After-Party and Sarah's Revenge
Holy Shit, Sarah just fucking murdered someone.
On After-Party and Sarah's Revenge
Oh fuck
By
Matisguy -
On After-Party and Sarah's Revenge
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